re-post: dirt

I've been TERRIBLE about blogging over the past few years, and even more so recently. As much as I'd like to believe I'm still a writer, I've given up practicing, and am therefore pretty rusty. Tonight was pure proof of that, and I'm taking the easy way out yet again by posting an old blog entry. However, as I spent some time writing tonight, I kept coming back to an entry I wrote a couple of years ago on my old blog... A lot of what I found myself writing about tonight sort of fits with this post, so I thought I'd re-post it. Hopefully, I'll start "practicing" more, and will get some new stuff up over the next couple of months.

DIRT

"Every flower must grow through dirt."
-- Anonymous

I think flowers may just be one of God's most stellar creations. I mean, just think about them... brilliant in color and scent. Delicate, and yet fiercely beautiful. And such an intricate process in order to live and grow.

I know a lot about the intricacies of plants, and the process of keeping them alive. Rather, my experience has been the opposite. I'm TERRIBLE at keeping plants alive. My poor plant at work goes from dry, to wilty, to watered, to dry, to wilty, and continues this cycle on a weekly basis. I'm so neglectful.

However, I'm fascinated by plants and flowers... how they require so many elements working together in order to sustain them, and that they require a lot of work - especially under human care... Such delicate things, those flowers...

Recently in my life, I've had a few people point out what would seem to be, to them, errors in my life. Areas where I am broken, lacking, failing... While there can be some validity to these sorts of "light casting" sessions, I struggle a great deal in believing them to be errors, or something that's "wrong" with me...

I love the above quote. It is so encouraging to my heart and soul, and I think it allows me to wrap my hands around people's comments regarding my character and my life a little bit more easily.

There's no question that a flower needs dirt to grow. It needs all the nutrients the dirt has to offer. Is everything about the dirt beneficial? Probably not. And the dirt isn't necessarily good for much more other than growing things. However, the dirt is absolutely necessary for growth. How often do we neglect our "dirt" or try to cover it up? Sure, we put flowers in cute flower pots, and sure we try to make them look as "homey" as possible... but the fact still remains: there's dirt. It's there. Everyone knows it's there. Everyone can see it. So why do we try so hard to mask our dirt? And how often do we prematurely cut the flower, put it in a vase with only water, and expect it to continue growing in it's new, sans-nutrient environment? I know for me personally, I've gone the vase route too many times. I've been disgusted with the dirt, sick of the clay pot... and decided the vase would be the best place to plant myself. But soon, my water supply becomes depleted, and I suddenly have nothing to promote my growth.

We need the dirt. We need all of the hurt, the pain, the raw emotion, the irrational fears... all of those stretching moments when we learn that we are much smaller and more incapable than we realize. Those moments - as ugly and dirty as they may seem - are really the things that drive our growth; they help us move forward, learn, and change. Sure there is a time to be uprooted... but we need to learn to embrace the dirt, and not look for the quickest route out of the pot.

The cool thing about flowers? Dirt alone won't do the trick. Flowers also need water and sunlight to survive, breathing life into them. How great is that? Our growth is not all about dirt, and we don't have to deal with just dirt 24/7.

I love this idea... Embrace the dirt. Know there will be sunshine.

May I learn to live everyday comfortable in the dirt, beaming amidst the sunshine.